i see faces and traces of home

there's not much left in this one horse-town for me. apart from old friends and loved ones, and a ceiling-high pile of dusty bits that were supposed to propel me to some sort of elevated state, i have no need for it. maybe the ocean. and the smell of the air way up here. but that's all.

there has been a paradigm shift in my little fuzzy brain. the only thing that i feel i am lacking right now is mental stimulation. i haven't been reading or writing or creating enough to get that shit ticking away like it used to.

i had a really intense nightmare last night. except i was only half-asleep, and the feeling of it was suffocating. i think i may have been trying to wake myself up. it was so odd. there was noise and dark colours, like reds and blacks in strange patterns. the noise was echoing endlessly but it wasn't a melodic sound, it just shuddered and filled my head, it made me feel sick and disoriented.

confusing.
but i was comforted by him. when i woke up.